crammed in a void

red-veronika

I should be preparing my stuff for the three-day retreat. I already fixed my closet.. I organized my clothes and stuff. I couldn't decide on what to bring. It's Tagaytay, I know, but I want to wear something sleeveless then have some jacket over. I'm going to bring an extra pair of shoes and rubber slippers. Socks = must. I cannot survive if my feet are exposed to low temperature. I love the cold but.. cold feet? :3

Important thing that I should bring? My medicine pouch containing iron supplements and Advil. Seriously, if I get a headache, all hell will break loose. I don't like events with crowds, que horror.

I am trying not to panic. My thesis is.. zero. Nothing is happening. It feels like I'm the only one with thesis in mind. I guess, it's time for me to step-up.. :/

Oh dear. Downstairs, my sister is teasing our kid brother. Kiddie crush thing is cute but..

I haven't been blogging. I've been busy with school shit and all. I had pictorial yesterday. Kewlness. :3

Random events:

- I learned how to iron clothes thanks to posters at YouTube.

- I learned how to use an eyeliner.

- Family and I went to Laguna for the usual cemetery stuff that I do not like.

- I used my new green dress for my creative photo.

- I sold my PSP.

- Chai had a haircut.

- I was able to encode my subjects.

- BIOTECH is starting to make me unhappy.

greenlife

I haven't been myself lately and been slacking off in everything I do. I have lost the vibe in giving attention to my  life. I have done things, I shouldn't be doing. I took risks because they said "life is a risk". I have waited for something that doesn't even exist because I always believe that "patience is a virtue". I have waited, yet it never happened. I have waited, and waited for more. I have waited but I can't deal the pain anymore. Now it's time to accept that things aren't exactly what they are. They may look so simple but it can be just a facade. Or worst than that, it can be a trap. The next thing you know, you are already shackled and can no longer escape.

Now all I want is a sweet escape.

I am making my own mess. I am making my own misery. And I need a fuckload of strength to move on. I can't wait forever. I am only human. I get tired and most of all I am also vulnerable to pain.